Am I the slowest runner EVER?

Slowest run ever? These stats speak for themselves.

According to my RunKeeper app, I just ran 1.1 miles in 36 hours and 7 minutes. That translates to a 32 hour, 56 minute mile.

The sports world was amazed when Roger Bannister first ran a 4-minute mile in 1954.

Moroccan Olympic gold medalist Hicham El Guerrouj now owns the world record for the mile at 3 minutes 43 seconds (watch him do it).

So how did I wind up taking 527 times as long as Mr. El Guerrouj to strut a mere four laps around my local high school track?

Forgetting to shut off the RunKeeper app will do that to you.

P.S. The world record for the Beer Mile — an insane competition requiring runners to chug a can of beer every quarter mile — is 4 minutes 57 seconds.