Tag Archives: Career Advice

Instead of graduation gowns, how about wearing Victoria’s Secret?

SEDUCTIVE EDUCATION: This TV commercial for an on-line college placement service airs during Judd Apatows "Undeclared" sitcom on the Independent Film Channel.

Today’s Boston Herald column explores the latest tactic in on-line college recruitment: Seduction.

On-line courses at established universities certainly have their appeal — especially for those of us who can’t give up the weekly paycheck. But if you’re an 18-year-old guy and want to meet real 18-year-old women, are you better off “never leaving home” or living in the college dorms?

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Opening Day Hooky

Instead of taking a vacation day or personal day, Fred Flintstone sneaked out of work incognito to go to a baseball game. Dishonesty is never a smart career move.

Sneaking out of work to go to the ballpark is a time-honored tradition that dates back to at least 1962, when “The Flintstones” first chronicled the practice. Fred plays hooky from his job at the quarry to go to the baseball game with Barney. To get in free on “Ladies’ Day,” he disguises himself in one of Wilma’s old dresses.

Much to Fred’s embarrassment, he runs into his boss, Mr. Slate, who is entertaining a client at the game. Spoiler alert: Fred miraculously gets away with the charade.

Not many fans go to such extremes. But at today’s Fenway Park home opener, there are bound to be a few who are watching the Sox-Yanks battle on company time. If you’re planning to be one of them, you need to take precautions.

Although I NEVER advocate lying to the boss for any reason, I’d hate to see a career senselessly ruined over a Sox addiction. In today’s Boston Herald, I share some exclusive tips to avoid being caught at the game.

As an aside, revisiting this Flintstones episode reminded me of my old age. I remember sitting in the Fenway bleachers when they were backless benches instead of seats. And things would get a little too cozy with the other fans, especially the tipsy ones who couldn’t hold on to their beer trays.

Fredericka Flintstone demonstrates the flaws of the old Fenway Park bleachers.

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Thirteen things NOT to say to unemployed friends

Boston Herald "Working Stiff" graphic

Sometimes the best way to “cheer up” an unemployed friend is to shut up and listen.

Or just send a fruit basket.

Offering well-meaning comments like “it was meant to be” or “everything happens for a reason” can come across as more trite than a fortune cookie.

Or as my job-hunting friend Rebecca puts it:

“People who say ‘everything happens for a reason’ are being sincere. That is their philosophy and they are trying to give you reassurance that things will work out okay. However, that’s not my world view and it’s being applied to my life and I have to sit there and take it because you mean well.”

“So I end up feeling even worse when someone offers that kind of comfort,” she adds. “I’m not only an unemployed loser, I’m also a bad person for silently critiquing your kind attempt to reach out!”

My favorite asinine remark: “Whenever God closes a door, he opens a window.”

God also drowns people (see Exodus 14:27).

Inspired by childhood influence Al Jaffee, the Mad Magazine cartoonist behind “Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions,” I serve up the 13 dumbest things you can say to an unemployed friend — with suggested witty (I think) comebacks.

Check out today’s Boston Herald.

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